and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
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