Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Too much gin, very little bucket
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Randomize
