it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Randomize
