No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize
