everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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