You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
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