Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
Randomize
