Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
Randomize
