Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
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