just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize