so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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