I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?
I accidentally burped into my bong.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
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