When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
I just sucked dick on a ferry
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
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