i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
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