Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Randomize