Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Who did Billy Mays play for?
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
Randomize
