that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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