My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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