How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
