Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
