Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Randomize
