I hate all girls vehemently.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
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