I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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