what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
