I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
Randomize