He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Randomize
