And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Randomize
