His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
