he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
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