I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
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