whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
Randomize
