I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
What a fucking waste of an outfit
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Randomize
