Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize
