But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Randomize
