grandma shit on top of the toilet
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
the liver wants what the liver wants
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
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