so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize