Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
Randomize
