His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
I'm really busy with my period
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