thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
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