Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
That's when you crack a 10am beer
I think I am morally bankrupt
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
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