Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
