im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
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