is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
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