I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Randomize
