A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
