My brain says no but my pants say off.
Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
tell your sister to shave her snatch
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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