i just wanna soil my oats bro
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
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