I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
Randomize