It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
