1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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