Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Randomize