She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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